How Being in Codependent Relationships Affected My Mental Health by C. Underwood
… However, sometimes we can lose track of who we really are and lose our identity. Most of my relationships in the past have been heavily codependent.
… There is nothing wrong with a little dependency — it can be nice to have the company and some things in life are just better with two. But when we rely completely on another person, it makes it incredibly hard to survive and adjust when you are alone.
…Without a flinch, I have spent more money than I had and jumped through hurdles I shouldn’t have. Fighting for love is romantic, it’s passionate — but is it right when it makes you miserable under those layers? Through all of my codependent relationships, I have learned now that it made me incredibly unhappy.
I would change my hobbies, my personality and just the whole of my identity so I could keep my partner, so they would always love me. I sacrificed hopes and dreams because I was too afraid to follow my own path, especially when it was only possible if I went it alone.
I missed out on so many opportunities and a long period of time when I should have been loving and respecting myself. When you start to lose who you are, it wreaks havoc on your mental health, especially when you don’t realize it — there is just something missing.
I make it incredibly clear with my husband as to what I want from life. I tell him my dreams and goals and we compromise so we can both live as two individuals who are in love. We encourage each other to keep the core and whole of what makes us individual but to enjoy every moment we do spend together.
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