• Complementarianism As One Basis For Sexual Harassment Against Women by C. C. James

A commentary about the “Me Too” and “Church Too” twitter trends, which highlighted sexual harassment against women by men.

The author here basically says in a much shorter format what I said in an older post comparing Christian Gender Complementarianism to Codependency:

The Silence Breakers: A Kairos Moment for the Church

Snippets:

by Carolyn Custis James

….But without investigating and addressing the sources of the problem, our efforts will fall short and the epidemic will persist.

In good conscience, we cannot adequately address this epidemic without exploring causative factors that increase female vulnerability and allow for such violations against women to occur in the first place. Otherwise, we are fighting a losing battle. We must take preventative action too.

Those Ubiquitous S-Words
Rachel Simmons, author of Enough As She Is, put her finger on a major contributing factor when she wrote,

Women have been taught, by every cultural force imaginable, that we must be ‘nice’ and quiet’ and ‘polite,’ that we must protect others’ feelings before our own. That we are there for other’s pleasure.

The same kind of social messaging for women intensifies in the church, reinforced by the claim that the Bible supports it.

We are not taught to be strong and courageous (even though that is the Apostle Paul’s message for us). We aren’t urged to develop the kind of backbone needed in awkward situations with the opposite sex. We aren’t conditioned to be decisive and proactive.

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• The Growing Partisan Divide Over Feminism by Peter Beinart – The Republican and Conservative Women Who Want to Remain in Denial About American Sexism

I became a Republican at a young age and left the Republican Party a few years ago. I am a conservative, I am pro-life, but I don’t belong to any political party. I’m not a liberal or a Democrat myself, nor do I go by the “feminist” label for reasons explained on other posts.

However, far more than other conservatives, I see the sexism in our culture. Sexism is not a thing of the past, as some of them like to believe or assert.

American women may have life easier or better than their counterparts in Islamic nations that practice Sharia Law, but American women face sexism never- the- less (sometimes American sexism can be just as bad, though, as I wrote about in this post, with examples).

I present below an article from The Atlantic which suggests that one reason so many conservatives are reluctant to admit that sexism is still prevalent in American culture is that they associate any and all discussion of sexism with far left wing feminism, and they despise far left wing feminism (most of them hear the word “feminism” and automatically and incorrectly associate all of it with extreme liberalism).

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• Complementarianism Misnomer: It’s Really About Male Hierarchy and Female Servitude to Men – It’s Not About The Sexes Complementing Each Other

Complementarianism Misnomer: It’s Really About Male Hierarchy and Female Servitude to Men – It’s Not About The Sexes Complementing Each Other


(I still have two or three posts in Draft status on this blog regarding the subjects of Toxic Masculinity and sexual harassment. I don’t know when or if I shall ever finish those.)


The word “complementarian” (or “complementarianism”) as used by Christian gender complementarians does not truly denote or connote the complementary natures of the two biological sexes, male and female, as they often like to claim.

Depending on the type of complementarian you are speaking with or whose literature you are reading, they are either overt or subtle about what they truly believe about the term and what it’s meant to convey.

I’ve seen complementarian material where it is just assumed, a given, it is underlying all their opinions and assumptions, that the Bible teaches that God intended for males to rule over females.

The main point of my post here is to point out the dishonesty and inaccuracy of the use of language by complementarians in this matter.

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• Contradictory Expectations For Both Sexes by Christian Gender Complementarians

Contradictory Expectations For Both Sexes by Christian Gender Complementarians

Part 2: Contradictory Expectations For Both Sexes by Christian Gender Complementarians: Are Women Weak, Vulnerable, Or Strong?


INDIRECT COMMUNICATION AND MANIPULATION

Quoting in part a commentator at Wartburg Watch blog, Darlene, who wrote:

…Because at the root of this system [complementarian “Spirit of Eve” teaching] is the idea that women, in their weakness, are always attempting to find a vulnerable spot in men in order to manipulate and control them. Men, therefore, must be vigilant and not let their guard down lest ‘Eve’ succeed and overcome them.

(The quote above is from the December 2017 Wartburg Watch thread, “What is the Difference Between Nouthetic and Biblical Counseling? Just the Spelling.”)

I notice that complementarianism sets up a few no-win scenarios for women, or complementarians create the very problems they complain about.

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• My Father Raised My Sister and Me To Act and Think Like Men

My Father Raised My Sister and Me To Act and Think Like Men

This post may be confusing to anyone who’s been to my blog before.

I’m writing this because it sort of ties into a post I have in Draft Stage right now about another topic.

It’s true that my mother was a very feminine, traditional values holding, devout Christian woman who raised me to be that way as well. (I may have mentioned all that in this post.)

My mother was also very codependent, because she grew up in an abusive, alcoholic home, and, as a Christian brought up under traditional gender role type views within Baptist churches, she really felt that girls and women being sweet,  delicate, compliant little doormats was God’s will.

Therefore, my mother strongly conditioned me to be a stereotypical feminine girly girl (the very sort which many of my fellow conservatives value and prize), which I hated for many reasons, one of which is that I was a tom boy as a kid.

As a girl growing up, I was not interested in being my mother’s version of feminine, or what passes for womanly and feminine among today’s conservatives, Christians, and Republicans.

I was not interested in dolls, or wearing frilly dresses when I was a girl, or always just sitting quietly reading books.

One of my mother’s biggest “hang ups” around girlhood and womanhood was that, in her view, girls and women should not feel anger and should above all never, ever express anger.

It would be mean, wrong, un-lady-like or un-Christ-like, my mother believed, for a girl or woman to be hostile, be assertive, show anger, be out-spoken, or have boundaries.

Those traits were the province of ‘Men Only’ and forbidden to girls and women, my mother believed, and it’s a view that is often supported in and among the churches we went to as I was growing up, and I sadly see a lot of conservatives today holding this view, as well.

In my family, because my mother was the warm and fuzzy parent, I felt closer to her. I felt safer around her. Mom was approachable. Mom was non-judgmental, non-critical.

So, I strove to emulate my Mom, which meant I tried very hard to stifle my anger if I felt anger, not be so out-spoken, and to be quiet, sweet, compliant, and deferential to all. I tried to be like Mom and usually succeeded.

My father, though, was the total opposite to my mother, and so he emphasized different values and qualities in both my sister and myself.

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• ‘My Therapist Won’t Let Me Break Up With Her!’ By Lori Gottlieb

‘My Therapist Won’t Let Me Break Up With Her!’ By Lori Gottlieb

Full codependency on display here (referencing a link, with excerpts from said link, much farther below).

A woman writes into an advice columnist asking if it would be acceptable to quit seeing her therapist, and, if so, how to go about it.

This woman, who is an adult (she says she’s in her late 20s), is too afraid, or feels too much guilt, to stop seeing her therapist.

She says her therapist won’t give her permission to stop going in for sessions.

The woman says her insurance no longer pays for therapy sessions, and the therapist refuses to reduce her prices.

The woman cannot financially afford to see this therapist, but the therapist keeps shaming, guilt tripping, and pressuring this woman to continue on, in spite of this.

So the woman writes into this advice columnist for input on what to do.

It’s clear to me that this woman patient suffers from a huge case of Codependency. She obviously does not understand she is in a voluntary relationship with this therapist, one she has been paying for, and that her doctor (the therapist) is taking advantage of her financially and emotionally.

This woman is being manipulated and is too naive or too afraid to see it or admit it to herself and stand up to the therapist.

It’s further obvious to me that the woman patient who wrote to this columnist has no concept of having boundaries, does not feel comfortable saying “no” and being assertive.

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• A Critique of the Seneca Griggs Blog ‘Wartburg Whiners’ (Part 1)

A Critique of the Seneca Griggs Blog ‘Wartburg Whiners’ (Part 1)

Part Two


Update, October 2017 – Griggs attempted to leave a comment on one of my newer posts about mental health, which I trashed. He apparently has another “Wartburg Whiners” blog hosted on WordPress here. (His active Whiners blog is hosted by Blogspot).

I have blocked Griggs under the name and info he used most recently to try to post to my blog here, which includes this information:

name: senecagriggs

e-mail: senecagriggs@yahoo.com

IP: 108.197.214.58


I am mystified at Seneca Griggs’ on-going obsession with, and hatred and venom at, TWW (The Wartburg Watch) blog.

Judging from Griggs’ Archives section, his blog was started in 2014, and he continues to post there as of 2017.

Griggs, also known as James Brown or Megs48 or Buzz English, has a blog, called “Wartburg Whiners,” where he regularly criticizes or nit picks almost every post Deb or Dee publish on their blog, TWW.

I have had my differences with TWW myself.  I don’t see eye to eye with the blog owners or all of the regular commentators there on every topic.

I’ve written before that, to my displeasure, the general flavor at that blog, and at ones like it, leans liberal, left wing, at least in the comment section. (You can read my thoughts about that here if you’d like.)

But how is it that anyone can so vehemently resent and object to a blog by people that are seeking to protect the vulnerable, the hurting, and the wounded, or to call churches to start preventing child molesters from victimizing church children?

“WHINERS”?

Why is a group of people, (some Christian, some not), who are concerned with aiding victims and seeing justice done, being characterized by Griggs as being “Whiners”?

Is it really charitable to call a group of people who want to help the marginalized and the abused, “whiners”? Or could Griggs simply not come up with a snazzier name for his blog, and that was all he could think up?

Not only do many of the participants at TWW blog speak up on behalf of the victims, but many of them have also been hurt by pastors, churches, some Christian doctrines, or by other Christians.

I guess Grigg’s blog title of “Whiners” would include me as well, since I was a regular participant there for a few years, and I still drop by on occasion. Thanks so much, Griggs, for casting me as nothing but a “whiner.”

Do you know how Jesus referred to the same types of people who Griggs is calling “Whiners” on his Whiners blog?

Jesus called them, or compared them to people or things such as, Prodigal Sons, Lost Coins, or, he said he would leave the 99 sheep to go in search of the One Lost Lamb.

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