• ACFJ Blog’s Hennessy Domestic Violence Series: Yes, Codependency Makes An Appearance

In this post I will be referencing (ACFJ) “A Cry for Justice” blog links located in this previous post on my blog:

Posts About Domestic Violence at Cry For Justice Blog in the ‘Don Hennessy Digest’ Series

ACFJ is a great resource pertaining to domestic abuse, particularly in a Christian context.

However, as I’ve explained in older posts, I don’t share their disdain for the term or concept of codependency.

As a matter of fact, the blog owners forbid the use of the term on their blog.

Over a year ago, when I left comments on one of their posts discussing the subject in their comments box, over two or three posts I left, the blog’s moderator(s) edited my post without asking me first and deleted all references to the word “codependent” or “codependency.”

Those who run the ACFJ blog feel – based on at least one book or article by a psychologist or some other sort of professional – the the term “codependent” is somehow “victim blaming” to any one in an abusive marriage.

I disagree.

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• Posts About Domestic Violence at Cry For Justice Blog in the ‘Don Hennessy Digest’ Series

Posts About Domestic Violence at Cry For Justice Blog in the ‘Don Hennessy Digest’ Series

The Christian blog ‘A Cry For Justice’ began work on a series of posts about domestic violence by author Don Hennessy.

I wish to comment on this material in a future post (that post is now complete and can be found here: ACFJ Blog’s Hennessy Domestic Violence Series: Yes, Codependency Makes An Appearance).

I will be referring to the links below when or if commenting in future posts.

For now, here are links to the content at ACFJ blog:

Don Hennessy Digest – index page with links to the blog series, such as

(Link): 1   Don Hennessy says domestic abusers are like pedophiles – and there’s not much proof they’re redeemable.

(Link): 2   “How He Gets Into Her Head” — an introduction to Don Hennessy’s book

(Link): 3   How the male intimate abuser selects, sets-up & grooms a target woman

(Link): 4   The male domestic abuser is as ‘psychephile’ — a sexual offender

5   Offending and re-grooming: the skills men use to abuse their female partners

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• Christians Need to Reform Their Ideas About Sex and Power by Megan Powell

This editorial I link to much farther below, by Powell, on Eternity News site, reflects several views I’ve held for a long time, one of which is that American Christians, especially the more conservative ones, are really not so different in their views towards gender and sexual behavior as the secular culture.

However, American Christians really like to run about in their blogs and podcasts saying their take on things is “counter cultural” and oh so very different from what they imagine liberals and feminists promote.

My response to that: No, it’s not. The Christian view is not all that different from what they, Christians, believe liberals and feminists supposedly promote or believe about sexuality.

Christians are actually maintaining and enabling the cultural status quo and re-enforcing cultural gender stereotypes and sexual practices they claim to be in opposition to.

I have also noted that strict adherence to traditional gender stereotypes, which Christians promote under gender complementarianism, are not going to resolve societal problems, such as divorce, transgenderism, and other things Christians say they are concerned about.

(Nor will heterosexual marriage, natalism, or the nuclear family “fix” societal ills either, but Christians from James Dobson to Al Mohler and secular conservative think tanks keep promoting these entities, though the Bible itself does not – not as a solution for cultural decay.)

Where the author, Powell, states:

…[we should be] teaching our sons a masculinity that isn’t based on power and aggression…

She would be describing some of the elements that encompass what feminists refer to as “toxic masculinity.” Many anti- feminists, Christians and conservatives misunderstand what the term “toxic masculinity” means.

Christians Need to Reform Their Ideas About Sex and Power by Megan Powell

#metoo shows the church has the same problem as society

A return to traditional sexuality and gender norms will not solve the problems raised by the #metoo movement, because research shows that it makes no difference to the incidence of sexual harassment and abuse.

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• Equally Yoked Teaching, Complementarianism, Christianity, and Singleness (part 1)

Equally Yoked Teaching, Complementarianism, Christianity, and Singleness (part 1)

Many Christians teach that Christians should only marry other Christians. This is at least an expectation or belief in Baptist churches, and I think some Protestant ones.

This view point is referred to as ‘being equally yoked.’

It was a view I used to believe in, and I was taught it as I was growing up in a Christian environment, but I rejected this view point a few years ago.

I occasionally run across still-hopeful, yet very naive, single Christian women ages 35 and older, who have yelled at me online on other blogs (such as this lady), that I am so very, very wrong to say that singles should not abide by the Equally Yoked proposition, and they, I guess, are still clinging to some hope that God will supernaturally send them a Christian Mr. Right to marry.

The sad truth is, I’m afraid, that there may not be a God, but if there is a God, if my lived experience and observation has taught me anything, it’s that this God is most likely not going to send most single Christian women who’d like to marry a single Christian man to marry.

For every single Christian woman who likes to think God specially sent her a Christian man on a romantic walk on the beach, there are full- to- partially- Christian women such as myself, who, in spite of years of praying and waiting on a spouse from God, never got one.

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• Misinterpreting “Head” Can Perpetuate Abuse by B. C. Miller

Misinterpreting “Head” Can Perpetuate Abuse by B. C. Miller

Snippets:

Instead of lovingly following the example of Christ, these men used the Bible as a weapon to control their wives. One specific way they did this was by interpreting the word “head” in Ephesians 5:23 and 1 Corinthians 11:3 to mean “authority” or “overlord.”

In the kingdom of God, all people are equal in worth and in opportunity—women are not under the power of men, nor are wives specifically under the one-way authority of their husbands. Understanding this principle helps eliminate abuse.

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• Devout Christian Man Murders His Wife and Small Daughters

I think this news story exposes a few flaws in conservative Christian teachings, such as, this idea that once married, a woman should submit herself to her husband (as though the husband is in authority over her), and the ‘equally yoked’ teaching, which stipulates that a Christian person should only marry another Christian.

I’m not seeing the point or the benefit in a woman “submitting” to a husband if the husband is violent, or in a Christian woman limiting herself to marriage to only another Christian (which wrongly assumes there are plenty of single, Christian men to date in the first place), when there may be less violent atheist men out there for women to marry.

Christian volunteer charged with killing wife and daughters, 7 and 8

December 23, 2017

A man described as a devout Christian who volunteered at a local church was charged this week with killing his wife and two young daughters after their bodies were found in a home in western Canada.

…Canadian authorities found the bodies Tuesday in Kelowna, British Columbia, and identified the victims as 33-year-old Clara Forman and her daughters, Yesenia, 8, and Karina, 7.

They charged Jacob Forman, 34, with the murders.

He showed no emotion during a brief appearance in court Thursday, Global News reported.

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• Sexism Existed Before Liberal Secular 1960s Feminism, Before the Me Too Twitter Trend, and Before Trump Was Elected President

 Sexism Existed Before Liberal Secular 1960s Feminism, Before the Me Too Twitter Trend, and Before Trump Was Elected President

In the following post, I take about every one to task:
Republicans, liberals, Democrats, conservatives, Trump supporters, Trump haters. You name it, I critique about every one here, regardless of where they stand politically.

So hang on and don’t quit reading at the first  several paragraphs in fury if you are a Trump hater, a liberal, a feminist, or a Democrat, because I also get around to addressing conservative and Republican writers who blame liberal feminists for rape and sexism.

Trump

Ever since Trump won office, I have seen many women – on blogs, Facebook groups, or in editorials in newspapers – imply or suggest that sexism exists now in American culture because Trump is in office.

A few of these Trump detractors may argue that sexism is now ‘worse’ under Trump than it was pre-Trump, but the sense I get from many women who dislike Trump is that Trump invented sexism.

I’m not kidding. The writing I’ve seen from some of these women (occasionally also by men who dislike Trump) is that there was no such thing as sexism in the U.S.A. until Trump won office in 2016.

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