• Roman Catholicism and Abuse Survivor Blogs

Roman Catholicism and Abuse Survivor Blogs

About 12 or 13 years ago, I did a lot of reading about Roman Catholicism. (I was brought up Baptist, and I’ve been in a questioning phase myself the last few years – as in, I don’t know how much I consider the Christian faith true or not, and how relevant is the Bible to me today, and so on and so forth.)

I came to the conclusion that I disagree with a lot of Roman Catholic views and theology. (Please be careful here and keep reading – my main concern with this post is not Roman Catholic beliefs per se.)

I’ve had Roman Catholic friends and co-workers over the course of my life, and I’ve met some here and there on other sites, and all are friendly and fine people.

However, I cannot come to share the view that Roman Catholicism is Christianity.

I can grant Catholics that there are issues with sola scriptura (as you may be aware, Roman Catholics frown on sola scriptura, to put Papal ex cathedra, their Magisterium, and Church Tradition on par with the written Word), but unlike other questioning Baptists (or Protestants), or those who feel they’ve been hurt or wronged by the Protestant or Baptist church, I don’t see the correction to that to be to dump sola scriptura and run out and join Roman Catholicism.

With our without sola scriptura, Roman Catholicism has its share of problematic theology.

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• Be Cautious: Faux Niceness, Victim-Bullies, and Survivor Abuse Blogs

Be Cautious: Faux Niceness, Victim-Bullies, and Survivor Abuse Blogs

 (this post has been updated below, July 5, as well as July 7, July 11, July 15)

Velour and Christiane continue to discuss TWW on Wade’s Istoria blog in this thread as late as July 14 / 15

Update to this post, a part 2: 

Velour Apparently (Was) Posting as Anonymous At Wartburg Whiners Blog – Also: Megs48 Posting to My Blog Same Person as Buzz English


This will be a very, very long post. You may want to get a cup off coffee while you read it.

I really do not want my blog here to turn into a running commentary on other blogs, such as TWW (The Wartburg Watch), but because I don’t feel as free to openly express myself at TWW, and that I don’t want to create any drama on other people’s blogs, I feel more comfortable posting some thoughts here on my blog.

That I don’t feel completely comfortable expressing all my views in their entirety at TWW in and of itself should be an indicator that something is amiss at TWW (and similar blogs, groups, and forums).

In this post, I believe I need to discuss certain personalities and not only general phenomenon.

I’m sorry if this makes me look as though I am being mean or petty, but in my view, certain persons have played a role in some of the negative dynamics going on at TWW.

The persons I will be focusing on the most in this post are TWW participants Velour and Christiane.

I think Deb and Dee are doing a good thing with TWW: their blog exists mostly to highlight the authoritarian natures of many churches and pastors, and the abuse that results in, and they also discuss the poor job churches do at preventing child sexual abuse – all of which is admirable.

My blog post here is not intended to be “anti TWW” or “anti Deb” or “anti Dee.” I hope it is not taken in that way.

I think most of the commentators at TWW are good, fine people – but a few are “bad apples,” and many of the rest are naive and seem blind to what is going on.

I’ve seen about two or three people who post there who I think are savvy to what’s been going on, but they don’t feel at ease coming right out and directly saying what’s on their mind on TWW. They drop mild hints instead. (Except for one fine post I spotted by member Beaker J. That is one of the few exceptions; more on that below.)

When posting to a blog such as TWW, one sort of feels a mild pressure to express their thoughts very obliquely, because the culture of the blog does not allow for direct communication.

(Direct communication is often viewed on many Christian sites, especially Abuse Recovery ones, as being mean and heartless. This is an un-spoken rule at blogs such as TWW; you pick up on it after lurking or posting there for awhile.)

I think at one time that TWW was a safe place for a person to share his or her story. If you’ve ever been hurt by a church, a doctrine, or a set of Christians, that blog was, at one time, a safe spot to share.

Somewhere in the last few months, or over the past year, things changed at TWW.  It’s hard for me to pinpoint exactly when things in the comment box there shifted.

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• Non-Church, Non-Spiritual, or Secular Remedies and Treatments Don’t Always Work

Non-Church, Non-Spiritual, or Secular Remedies and Treatments Don’t Always Work

This is not the post I had planned on writing.

I was briefly discussing in an older post that most American Christians and most churches are utterly terrible at assisting most people who have mental health problems (and I’d also add addiction problems, domestic violence problems, and many other types of problems).

In order to appreciate my position on things, I feel a reader might want to read about my experience with depression and anxiety.

From the age of 11 to the time I was approximately 32 or 33 years old, I saw around four or five different psychiatrists, one psychologist, and one therapist, all for clinical depression and anxiety. (I also saw the therapist to receive grief counseling.)

I know at least one of those several doctors was a Christian, though we never talked about Jesus or faith matters in our sessions.

I have no idea what the religious beliefs were of the other MHPs (Mental Health Professionals) I visited.

From around the age of 15 or 16, up until I was about 33 years old, I was prescribed various anti-depressant medications and about two different anti-anxiety medications.

The medication dosages were modified by the doctors when they didn’t seem to be working for me at their initial dosages.

At some point during my 20s (I do not recall the exact age or for how long, but at least one year), I stopped seeing doctors and stopped taking the pills, because the doctors and the pills were not working.

I also halted medical treatment of my depression and anxiety because I assumed God was refusing to heal me and help me because I was using non-faith means (i.e. medical science) for a solution.

A small part of this view of mine was due to Christian teaching I saw or heard that cast the use of doctors and medications for psychological problems as being sinful or as showing a lack of faith.

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• Problems with A.A. (Alcoholics Anonymous)

Problems with A.A. (Alcoholics Anonymous)

Alcoholism runs in my mother’s side of the family. My mother’s father, one of her older brothers, and my two siblings are alcoholics. I have always been a teetotaler.

My sister seemed to drink too much to cope with the stress of life. She later stopped drinking on her own.

My sister never joined AA or any other programs, nor did she seek any sort of medical treatment for her drinking problem. To this day, she will occasionally drink moderately at social functions, but she no longer gets drunk as she once did.

My brother joined AA (Alcoholics Anonymous) while he was in his 30s and was a member for at least several years, possibly longer.

I am not sure if my brother feels that AA helped him with his drinking problem or not, because I never asked him.

I did notice that after my brother joined AA, some of his attitudes or communication methods changed, and not always for the better.

The troubling, negative changes in my brother led me to research AA online to see if I could understand how or why AA had changed him so.

I spent a few weeks reading articles about AA, as well as visiting blogs and forums by ex-AA members.

What I discovered from reading this material was that AA was ineffective for most who used it; sexual abuse took place by AA members of other AA members or of those member’s children; the program itself is ‘addictive,’ (in a manner of speaking) which is not good; and, AA fosters a very victim-blaming mentality in some of its members.

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• Topics and Concerns Under-Reported by Christians or Abuse and Survivor Sites

Depending on my level of interest and schedule, I may, in the future, write separate blog posts discussing some of the topics I am listing below.

Some of the survivor or abuse recovery sites, forums, groups, and blogs I visit (whether ones owned by conservative Christians, liberal Christians, or ex Christians) do a wonderful job of exposing the problems of things such as authoritarianism and child-abuse (and wife-abuse) cover-ups by churches.

Those are certainly important topics that are deserving of coverage.

Some abuse or survivor blogs will cover some of the issues I have mentioned below, but only by way a “token” post or two.

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• Not Exactly Always Hospitable for Non-Liberals: Ex or Liberal Christian Sites and Spiritual or Abuse Survivor Blogs & the Christian Trump-Bashing Infatuation

Not Exactly Always Hospitable for Non-Liberals: Ex or Liberal Christian Sites and Spiritual or Abuse Survivor Blogs & the Christian Trump-Bashing Infatuation 

I’ve been center of right, politically, since I was a kid.

I don’t know where I currently stand in regards to the Christian faith.

However, I still adhere to traditional values, which are pretty much in line with a conservative Christian understanding of the Bible.

Though I find myself somewhat more and more of a libertarian in outlook as I grow older, meaning, hey, I don’t agree with your lifestyle choices, but if you’re an adult, and it’s not hurting me or John Doe, I don’t really care what you do in your personal life.

I did not vote for anyone in the 2016 U.S. Presidential elections because I disliked all candidates.

However, I don’t care who YOU voted for, or if, like me, you sat that one out and did not cast a ballot at all.

I understand my Democrat friends who voted for Hillary and why. I understand my Democrat friends who hated Hillary so they were vying for Sanders.

I understand my Republican and conservative friends who loved Trump, or the ones who dislike Trump but hated Hillary more, so they went with Trump.

I also understand the folks who didn’t like either Trump or Hillary, so they went with a third party guy.

I am okay with any all all those above scenarios. I don’t get angry, offended, and upset by people, whether Christian or not, if they voted for Hillary, Trump, a third party candidate, or if they wrote “Mickey Mouse” on their ballot.

A lot of people had good reasons for why they voted as they did. Nobody, or I would suspect, hardly anyone, is a monster, rube, sexist, racist, or idiot just because they voted for one candidate or another, or did not vote at all.

It was a difficult election for just about every one, regardless of political stance.

That should give you an idea of where I am coming from.

EX CHRISTIAN, LIBERAL CHRISTIAN, OR SPIRITUAL ABUSE TWITTER ACCOUNTS OR BLOGS

In the last 3 to 4 years, I have participated on spiritual abuse blogs, and have lurked at Christian gender egalitarian forums, blogs, groups, and I have followed Christian gender egalitarians (or mutualists) on social media.

Can I just say as someone who is right of center, who holds to traditional values, I sometimes find such persons, groups, blogs, or Twitter accounts a little oppressive, myopic, or unfair?

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• Victimhood, Victim Blaming, and Moving On

Victimhood, Victim Blaming, and Moving On

This will be a difficult post to write, because I’m sure some people may take parts of it the wrong way, or be inadvertently insulted or offended, but I mean no insult or offense.

In the past week, at least two blogs I sometimes visit that highlight the topic of spiritual abuse, have featured posts that discuss how spiritual, physical, or sexual abuse in childhood can affect a person even into late adulthood.

I totally agree – things done to us in childhood can indeed impact us into adulthood. (Some of my family members, my father included, do not acknowledge this fact – but that might be another topic for another post to write in the future.)

At any rate, arguments ensued among commentators on such blogs as to if, when, or how, it is compassionate, feasible, or wise, to scold, shame, lecture, or encourage a victim to “move on,” and to do things such as seek out a mental health professional.

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